a " DOg bITe dOG" wOrLD...

shhhh... just leave me alone...
i've finished the show... i need no appalause...
just let it die down n be hidden away from pple who dunno..
for the sake of the everyone, for u, for me, for our fren..
let's make life easier for eveyone..

Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings – Samuel Jackson
a leader with no self confidence will not go far..
he will not be able to accomplish much.. as a leader..
he may be capable.. but he's onli just a capable worker..
i'm confident.. some say i am full of myself..
i'm a leo.. it's natural.. it becomes inborn after 4 years of leadership experience..
my frens say tt u can feel it even without working with me..
full of myself i may sound.. ya so wad?

Rank does not confer privilege or give power, It imposes responsibility – Peter Drucker
I chose to run for vp at the belief and confidence I have what it takes to deliver at this level and at the same time I am very much intrigued by the challenging role of handling matters at top level while at the same time opening an ear to the needs at ground level of all non-club students.

tt's wad i was prepared to say.. if someone were to shoot me..
service is unconditional, yes it is..
but we;re onli human.. is there realli nth tt u wan in return?
i wanted the experience.. onli as a vp..
not secretary, not anything else...
any other offer seems meaningless to me now..
especially after wad i;ve gone thru throughout this experience..
the opportunity to see more clearly the hearts of some pple..
the inevitable ugly side of such events..

no chance, no responsibility..
every member in a team has a common responsibility..
a common goal tt is.. a general one..
but each one has specific role to play..
just like games like diablo.. u dun send all ur men to attack one enemy..
it is the reason y there are distinction among the names of these members..
every name comes with a different duty..
small or big they may be the same..
different duties but all for efforts to achieve their ultimate common goal..

a commander who leaves his men in critical moments of war is no leader..
he is but onli someone who takes advantage of ur loyalty..
he is but onli someone someone who claims teamwork for his own benefit..
a fren in need is a fren indeed..
my fren?

wad do i have to say?
dun bother asking....

back to initial plan..

it's been some time since my last post..
it's week 3 already and i havent started my engines..
been busy with a lot of things...
thinking hard and planning...
this week is exceptionally hiong..
mon i had my 1st cm lab.. wasnt told my lab venue, wasnt told if there was prelab, didnt noe wad to do except for bringing lab coats n goggles..
tue which was yesterday, i had chess elections...
sad to say tt i failed to convince the exco tt i am a leader and I am the better choice...
given the opporunities to perform in fwc, i am sure i have done my best for my freshmen...
i am proud to say tt i;ve done my part for them...
n if there are any juniors who need my help, i promise i'll still be there...
glad to see tt ps finally has the courage to step up and run for vp..
though he was competing with me n he has won, i'm realli happy for him..
n also chess... he's capable n i am the one who nominated him..
let's hope the present comm will be a better one...
much much better... coz there are so much tt can be done..
so much said of no use...
i;m glad tt i tried and stuck on to my decision despite seeing wad has happened coming before the election itself...
as my fav quotes goes "i can accept failures, but i cannot accept no trying. ~ micheal jordan"
will be gg back to my intial plans..
i'm grateful for all the support i;ve gotten thru these times..
glad tp see my frens who came down to support me n believe tt i was up to it..
n especially dear... who realli helped me a lot with my speech n mental preparation..
yup... thu got tut presetation.. haha.. my grp mates like my answers..
dunno if i am gg to be the one presenting instead of the grp together..
o wadvere.. lol...
n fri lsm lab.. heard it's not too bad..
hai.. happening week...
may all my experience, good n bad.. be transformed to my strength n motivation tt will carry me thru the rest of my life.. or at least this important semester...

a PEak AT RAG & flAg at PS & a lil reflections..

went down to help dear with exhibiton yesterday..
haha.. didnt seem like they realli need more manpower...
but i did help out quite a bit..
well.. i am glad tt i got to see a bit of rag n flag.
didnt regret gg down to help..
got to see a few dances..
n the almost full kr rag presentation...
they made a freakin cool train out of junk n scrap materials...
it has wings tt couldbe extended... n it flaps~!!!
alright.. i sound like a country pumpkin..
but it's realli cool...
may be i'll still go down to take a look next year.. hahaha..
if u havent watched one, u got no idea wad u r missing out...

who says singaporeans have no creativity....
go down to ps n take a look at wad ur future lawyers, doctors, engineers are made of...
we have sexy doctors who can realli shake their booty...
n lawyers who do cheer leading...
ha...

anyway... sch has started.. but i'm still in holiday mood..
guess i havent played enuff... so ya noe..
actually kinda sick of uni life..
i shud be out of pru already... had enuff fun with organising events...
thinking of doing sth else..
gg back to sports soon..
when my back have recovered n all...
n hopefully i can lose the 6kg tt has been adding onto areas tt i've unwillingly been taking up in the pictures tt i have taken for the past 1 year...ha..

i finally understood wad dear meant by the happiness he felt when he saw the result after making effort to improve himself and grow for our relationship.. coz i did it too.. :)
we dun always have to quarrel do we?
jus need a lil more understanding and communication... :)

missing the team bonding and team spirit, team work i used to have in sec sch n jc...
havent been seeing much of tt in uni..
well there are.. just not as strong n bonded as wad i had before..
issit different becoz mine was a sport?
no crying and laffing together..
no bleeding, no falling together..
no pats on shoulder, no massage...
no selflessness..
if there are, lil i wud say..

do pple get more selfish when the grow up?
afraid of ur partner stealing away ur attention?
afraid ur partner stealing away ur credits?
does this chi phrase "yi shan bu neng chang er hu" (direct translation: 1 mountain cant hide 2 tigers) applys all the time?
boy... i;m amazed by wad i am saying.. my england..lol..
anyway.. ya.. wad makes a gd leader? can there be no true partnership?
common vision is impt for leaders n hence the team..
trust is.. n a true understanding of wad team work is..
it;s such a sad thing tt i dun see it prominent in any parts of nus..

another 2 weeks of holiday?

whee.. i felt gd yesterday.. coz i bright my lil bro to wild wild wet..
short stay there.. with lil rides to try...
but my lil bro is quite happy.. so yup.. i'm happy too...

treat my fmaily to korean bbq with cost me 204 bucks~!!
there goes all my ang bao money.. lol..
but it;s sth new... everyone was so overwhlemed by the variety...
mummy didnt stare at dear... hahahha..
i didnt realli noe wad i ate..but i was very full...

den i went to pat-tor with my dear at esplanade...
hehehehe....

happy-sha la la-

HapPy HapPy BIrthDay~!!

yippee~!!
celebrated with luna last night..
birthday celebrations for the august babies - shanbing & i..
we went cine to ktv for 5.5h..
hahaha sang quite a bit... i am glad tt everyone sang...
n hopefully everyone enjoyed themselves..
hmm before seth left, he played the birthday song with his guitar and sang along with the rest..
wad a plesant surprise.. hehehe :)
den we went to mahanttan for dinner..had cake n all..

hmm... this year's birthday is realli good..
enjoyed myself.. n got to share this happiness with my friends n family..
i find tt i realli mature after every year...
in the recent years, i always had memory flashbacks on this special day..
the times i laff, had fun n got to know so many great friends...
the times i cried... the times i learnt tt it is possible for one to be so upset tt she could not tear anymore..
the times i screwed up, at rock bottom of my life..
the times i became stronger, fought back and saw who my true frens are..
the time i met my dearest.. slc aka sdu camp for leaders..
who saw and help me thru my darkest time of my life and saw me fight back..
who became my best fren..
and now someone who has became me pillar of support and my motivation..
hahaha..
so much has happened last year..

i'm thankful to have so many frens ard me...
yimin for waiting for me at computer centre bus stop for 30min and paying taxi fare for me when i onli had $5 in my wallet~!!
ahh i havent pay her back~!!
ok.. i realise there's too many pple i wanna thank.. heee... thanks to all~!!

i'm thankful tt my mum gave birth to me 20 years ago on this day..
giving me a chance to see this beautiful world..
a chance to see the dark side so i learnt to appreciate the brighter side better..

i;m also thankful to have my family members ard me even when everyone else turn against me..

this year is special..
becoz i am trying to share a lil bit more..
gg to treat my family to traditional korean bbq later... ex lo~!!!
my pocket gg to have a huge hole later...
hahaha.. but it's worth it.. to thank everyone for being there for me for the last 21 years..

frens.. next year ok? 21st bdae~!!! hehehehe...

welcoming the new academic year...

it's my last day at work today.. FINALLY~!!
couldnt wait to get my ass out of the office..
hehehe...
held on onli becoz of my mum..
haiz....
bought curry puff for everyone...
but there were so few data entry staff tt most of them were given to the senior staff ard..
sigh...
i wonder if anyone's jealous..
coz i seem to have some kinda priviledge becoz of my mum...
ms moria, the media manager actually initiated to give me a lunch treat..
n she asked everyone else in the office including all the senior staff ard whom i didnt work with along..
hahaha.. like some big shot in office...
feel weird..
i appreciate it.. but dun realli feel good tt pple r treating me differently becoz my mum is " someone" in the department...

right.. i need to up my caps..
actually tot of quitting everything n just concentrate on my school work..
may be go swim or jog whenever i am free..
just go back to sch n sports kinda lifestyle..
hmm.. been approached to join the forces...
dunno if it's worth it...
it;s nice to be able to do sth, improve the system for ur course mates n all..
n organise events, lead the team n all..
i;ve had my share n i noe it's fun n like it...
but.. i guess we still have to balance a bit..
studies is still one of the most impt thing for a student...
especially for chem engineers...
sigh.. i am quite torn apart... shud i?

time to do some research perhaps...
time to plan my year ahead..
time to set targets for the new year..
it's quite a gd way to mark the end of my 1st year in uni..
hahaha 20 here i come...
to grow to a real woman~!

welcoming the new academic year...

it's my last day at work today.. FINALLY~!!
couldnt wait to get my ass out of the office..
hehehe...
held on onli becoz of my mum..
haiz....
bought curry puff for everyone...
but there were so few data entry staff tt most of them were given to the senior staff ard..
sigh...
i wonder if anyone's jealous..
coz i seem to have some kinda priviledge becoz of my mum...
ms moria, the media manager actually initiated to give me a lunch treat..
n she asked everyone else in the office including all the senior staff ard whom i didnt work with along..
hahaha.. like some big shot in office...
feel weird..
i appreciate it.. but dun realli feel good tt pple r treating me differently becoz my mum is " someone" in the department...

right.. i need to up my caps..
actually tot of quitting everything n just concentrate on my school work..
may be go swim or jog whenever i am free..
just go back to sch n sports kinda lifestyle..
hmm.. been approached to join the forces...
dunno if it's worth it...
it;s nice to be able to do sth, improve the system for ur course mates n all..
n organise events, lead the team n all..
i;ve had my share n i noe it's fun n like it...
but.. i guess we still have to balance a bit..
studies is still one of the most impt thing for a student...
especially for chem engineers...
sigh.. i am quite torn apart... shud i?

time to do some research perhaps...
time to plan my year ahead..
time to set targets for the new year..
it's quite a gd way to mark the end of my 1st year in uni..
hahaha 20 here i come...
to grow to a real woman~!

when her man is busy...

it is likely tt a woman will feel unloved, ditched, unwanted, taken for granted when her man is busy and he cannot give her the attention she needs, the quality time she needs... full attention i mean...

here's some advices from my personal experiences and wad i've read so far:
1. stay strong
2. throw ur neagtive tots n feelings aside
3. try physco urself tt he's busy and stressed up
4. understand tt u r always in his mind n heart
5. he onli needs u to be there for him.. to listen to him complain, to give him the tightest n biggest hug u can give even if u cant wrap ur arms ard him.. :P
6. if u cant do the above very well, start keeping urself busy..
7. be patient n wait for ur man..

he'll be back.. at least tt's wad i experienced.. with even more than u expected.. he;ll appreciate it.. n he'll be sweeter than before... tt's my boy...

lalalalala....

hello.. i am back~!!

back from my lil getaway with dearie... hehehe..
well, we didnt realli do much..
everything else the same..
but i guess we realli have time to slack together since we got a chalet...
dun have to worry so much about time n all..
heheheh..

n i got a lil birthday surprise celebration from dear..
hehehe.. simple yet difficult to plan i guess...
he made sparkles to compensate for the fireworks we didnt get to see on the first day..
so sweet.... haha didnt get to see the words "happy birthday" but it's realli pretty..
realli appreciate it coz he was so busy..
wasnt easy for him to go for this chalet already..

i guess wad we do isnt realli impt..
wad matters is the quality..
quality time is impt...
even lazing ard n not doing anything constructive feels gd... :P

Counting down to the day i turn 20~!!!

11 days to 20!!

pple say tt when u turn 20, time will start to pass by realli fast...
ha.. i wonder...
ever since i stepped in uni..
time have already sped up..
dun have to wait till 20..
or... o gosh.. will it speed up even faster?

coz i have so many things tt i wanna do unaccomplished...
no time for everything..
hai...
i noe wad to wish for this year.. hehehe..