Why cant u just get OUT OF MY MIND?!!

i had enuff of this sick shit...
so frustrated with everything..
the more i think of it, the more i feel cheated...
how the heck did i get myself into such a mess?
y did i allow myself to give so much?
Y?!!!! y?!!!!!! Y?!!!!

It's so hard to pull everything back now...
if u onli liked me a lot.. if it;s not enuff to call it love,
y come so close to me?
y bother going through so much drama to win my heart?
y did u allow wad happen tt day to happen?
y did u even try kissing me the very first time?
i had so many flash backs..
from the first time we met..
the first time we had a heart to heart chat..
the first time we watched a movie together..
when u said tt u felt the urge to hold my hands..
u got no idea how touched i was.. i melted..
ok i am s softee.. perhaps tt's y i am so easily cheated..
fell into this miserable trap...
i am such an idiot.. to believe tt u r ready..
to believe tt u might be the one i am looking for..
to believe tt u loved me..

how is everything gonna return to before after all tt has happened?
it's impossible~!
i'm deeply hurt...
by u.. my onli love...
i hope everything will become hate..
i wanna let go of everything now.. badly~!
i wanan forget u..us...
every single word tt u said tt is registered in my stupid brain...
OUT~! OUT U GO..
LEAVE MY MIND..
LEAVE MY LIFE..
LEAVE MY WORLD..
dun appear in front of me..
i dun wan to be reminded of wad we been thru together..

we can never be frens..
dun think we can...
i said tt i dun blame u for losing feelings for me..
yes i dun..
but i cant help it..
i cant forgive u for bringing all these pain to me..
it hurts too much.. becoz i love u too much..
too soon.. too soon...seth's right..

pls stay away from me...
i have no mroe tears to cry for u...
val's right.. u dun deserve my tears...
time to move on..

so afraid of being alone now.. coz i'll keep thinking about us..
thanks edmund... for accompanying me today...
narnia was not bad...
i am glad n blessed with so many angels ard me...
cheong hua was first..

ghim was there..

felix was there..

mengyi was there..

so was arvind..

when i flooded aranda right after our closure on the fone..

thanks to all who asked.. n showed concern...

hongkeat, liang han... cheryl especially...

paulene...

i dunno if i missed out anyone..

but thnaks to all of u..

i'll be stronger..

i'll not cry anymore for tt jerk...

not like he cares.. not like he feels anything..

y would he?

he feels nth for me anyway...

stay away from me.. dun trick me into this dreadful trap again...

i dun wan to fall deeper..